What I Learnt Today

It’s not about the nail!

I don’t need you to fix things, I just need you to listen.

 Hat tip to Brendan

What I Learnt On 15th September in other years

15th September 2011 Reptile World

“A country’s cuisine exists in the memories of their people and in those who have passed along their food knowledge and wisdom for centuries.”

So says the Acadameia Barilla of Parma, dedicated to the art of Italian gastronomy.

The Academia has recently handed down the Ten Commandments of Italian Cooking. Mea Culpa. At various times, it appears, I have broken most of them.

I’ve checked the following with my friend Rinaldo. He was horrified to think anyone would not find these self evident.

You Shall Not Have Cappuccino after breakfast

.
Espresso yes, Cappuccino no. And even then never during a meal.

Risotto and pasta are not a side dish.

Pasta is a course in its own right, and not served with other courses.

You shall not add oil to the water when cooking pasta!

Oil should not be added to pasta cooking water! Rinaldo could not believe anyone would consider doing this. Oil must be added only after you have drained it from its cooking water.
The Acadamia has instructions on how to cook pasta like an Italian.

Its tagliatelle bolognese, not spaghetti.

In real Italian cuisine the pairing of the right kind of pasta with the right sauce is considered almost sacred.

You Shall not Serve Chicken Pasta

In Italy there are no hot dishes featuring pasta and chicken.

Real Italian restaurants don’t do the chequered tablecloth thing.

Chequered Tablecloths indicate the restaurant is targeting tourists. You have been warned.

You shall not add Ketchup to pasta

At least I am innocent of this crime against cuisine,

Thou Shall do what Mama does

As the Acadamia says

She knows from her mamma, who knew from her mamma who knew from her mamma and so on. It’s been tried and tested. And what a mother teaches at her daughter while they are cooking? That love is the center of all. We must share Italian food with your loved ones. It is what life, love and family are all about.

What I Learnt On 14th September in other years

14th September 2011 The Only Good Red Dot is a Dead One

This blog has been on sabbatical for the last few months while we moved to a new server.

During this time, I have turned plentysomething.

I know this, as I can identify with the plentysomething characteristics as outlined by Richard Glover.

Are you plenty something?

• Plentysomethings can no longer read the menu in any Sydney restaurant. This is because the lighting is turned down to a level so dim you feel as if you’re dining in some sort of al-Qaeda cave. The aim, presumably, is to hide the tomato sauce stains on the waiter’s apron. Perhaps they also realise the phrase “served with a decadent sorrel sauce made in the traditional artisan manner” looks less ridiculous if rendered in eight point. Operating in this Stygian gloom, most of us just point to the third dish down and hope for the best. This is the reason we end up eating so much offal.
• Plentysomethings know to buy the second-cheapest of everything, except when it comes to shoes.
• Plentysomethings can no longer hear anything that’s said in any Sydney restaurant. That’s because they’ve ripped out all the curtains and floor coverings so the whole thing is like an echoey box. Every dining experience is spent like a startled meerkat, sitting bolt-upright and alert just in case you manage to catch a passing word from someone at your table, from which – using your massive and experienced brain – you can usually reassemble the whole conversation. Lucky, huh?
• Plentysomethings do not understand the whole bottled water thing. We come from a time in which people would commonly attempt a 20-minute walk in the park without needing to take the sort of water supplies usually associated with Rommel’s North African campaign. It seems remarkable to say so, but in 2003 and 2004, human beings could often go for a whole hour, maybe even two, without what is now called “rehydration”. On Sydney’s more popular walking tracks, people now take a sip from their multiple bottles every three or four steps. What’s going on? Have they left a valve open? Could it be that, in the past six or seven years, the human race has sprung some sort of leak?
• Plentysomethings know that a coffee past 10pm is not worth it.
• Plentysomethings, by and large, are not dogmatic in their thinking. They have been around long enough to have heard both sides of most arguments. I myself hold three mutually contradictory opinions on the burqa, which, I believe, is merely a sign I’ve been paying attention.

See Richard’s full list of the other plentysomething traits.

What I Learnt On 13th September in other years

13th September 2011 Rods, Cones and Colours

A group of 40-year-old buddies discuss where they should have dinner. Finally it is agreed that they should meet at Mario’s restaurant because the waitresses there have low-cut blouses and nice breasts.

Ten years later, at 50 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss where they should have dinner. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at Mario’s because the food there is very good and the wine selection is good also.

Ten years later, at 60 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss where they should have dinner. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at Mario’s because they can eat there in peace and quiet and the restaurant is smoke free.

Ten years later, at 70 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss where they should have dinner. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at Mario’s because the restaurant is wheel chair accessible and they even have an elevator.

Ten years later, at 80 years of age, the group meets again and once again they discuss where they should have dinner.. Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at Mario’s because they have never been there before

Hat tip to B.

What I Learnt On 8th April in other years

8th April 2011 Play Player 1 – Space Invaders Strikes Back

Will sent me this and seemed to think it was amusing.

Looks perfectly fine to me.

What I Learnt On 25th March in other years

25th March 2012 Didja Havagoodweegend?

25th March 2011 Photoshop Basics in 25 minutes

You may never look at a can of Coca-Cola in the same way again after reading What Coke Contains by Kevin Ashton.

The manufacture of a can of Coke begins in Pinjarra, Western Australia and ends in your local corner store via Greenland, Atlanta, Africa and South America.”The number of individuals who know how to make a can of Coke is zero. The number of individual nations that could produce a can of Coke is zero. This famously American product is not American at all. Invention and creation is something we are all in together.

Modern tool chains are so long and complex that they bind us into one people and one planet. They are not only chains of tools, they are also chains of minds: local and foreign, ancient and modern, living and dead — the result of disparate invention and intelligence distributed over time and space.

Coca-Cola did not teach the world to sing, no matter what its commercials suggest, yet every can of Coke contains humanity’s choir.”

What I Learnt On 5th March in other years

5th March 2011 AppSpin: SoundHound

Do chimps have faster short term memories than humans?

Some spoil sports dispute the conclusion, but I’m with the monkey.

Go Ayumu.

Can you beat Ayumu?

Try it out here. You may be surprised at how well you can do.

What I Learnt On 16th February in other years

16th February 2016 See all five visible planets together tomorrow morning

16th February 2015 Five Things I Didn’t Know About New Zealand

16th February 2011 siseneG – Arthur C Clarke’s shortest short story

A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport this morning as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, a slide-rule and a calculator. At a press conference just before noon today, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. Although he did not identify the man, he confirmed the man has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

‘Al-Gebra is a problem for us’, the Attorney General said. ‘They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.’ They use secret code names like “X” and “Y” and refer to themselves as “unknowns” but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philosopher Isosceles used to say, “There are 3 sides to every triangle.” The Attorney General went on to say “Teaching our children sentient thought processes and equipping them to solve problems is dangerous and puts our government at risk.”

What I Learnt On 11th February in other years

11th February 2011 My Parents Were Awesome – The Website